I searched essays I wrote at the end of each past few years, looking for some old new year resolution or year reviews, so that I can compare those with what I have and am now, and make some comments about it. It turned out there wasn't much resolution or reviews. December 31, 2007, I was in Bangkok with dear rumei, no resolution. December 31, 2006, I couldn't remember much, except rose flavor Vodka, and I wrote sth explaining the relationship between me being in good mood and writting less essays here... so seems my life was not as miserable as I thought.

 

However, 2008 is a bit different, and it definitely deserve an essay here.

I used to say that life is a road, you walk on it, see different views, meet different people, across different river, rocks, thorns, fog, choose different turnoffs, then views changed, some people are gone while some people stayed on the same road with you. I took a big turn this time, so there are much new view, people, thorns, fog, and blahblahblah...on this new road. Here are the new things:

 

I learned how to swim, how to drive, how to speak hello, how are you, how old are you, you are beautiful..... in Spanish.

I lost my grandpa...but maybe he is alive in another world, looking at me happily, so I look up, smile back, and wave.

I ate Peking roast duck officially for the first time, after 8 years being in Beijing, thanks to my cousin.

I stayed in my best friend's sofa for several nights. They are not comfortable, but sweet, very sweet.

I tried Cross-Stitch, but didn't finish it.

My best friend married an Indian and moved to Singapore, I wish I could go to her wedding, and dancing in saree.

Another best friend got married too, and had gorgeous wedding photos. So happy for her.

I hugged my mom and dad goodbye for the first time in my life, took the train in the new terminal in Beijing international airport, and came to the US alone with suitcases that were heavier than myself. 

I went to school everyday, confused about Marketing professor's indian English, and American classmates' jokes, and got so bored in Statistic class that I laughed at regression graphs.

I blamed myself for not being active enough in classes.

I cooked many dishes for the first time, such as steamed fish, french toast, failed brownie, grandma's special pancake and spicy dried turnip, weird sandwich with turkey, ranch, spicy sauce, eggs, peanut butter in it (I liked it, but all my American friends said it was weird, but shouldn't be cooking more creative?), mooncakes...

Inspired by rumei, I bought myself the first plant, now I have two plants in my room, everytime I water them, I feel closer to rumei.

My tolerence to alcohol decreased.

I had this thought about how to find the exact amount of alcohol that can depress certain part of your brain that is disturbing you, but activate those parts that make you happy, without getting drunk or buzzed enough to do silly things.

I explored bars and clubs in Atlanta with my classmates, so I was elected as one of the top 3 international students who embraced American culture the most.

I stayed up late to watch American President final election, and then Obama's live "yes we can" speech. Somehow, Obama looks like an investment banker to me.

I went to a church, listened to their chorus, drank their coffee, didn't make any contribution, didn't confess neither, but I did sing with them.

I learned it for 2 hours and performed Tai Chi in front of my whole class. Some one said he felt like having a massage by watching us. I took that as a compliment.

A friend of mine was hit by a car one night and she called me for help, so I talked with 911 people, and experienced the whole process in American Emergency Center for the first time. I wish that was also my last time.

I went to DC, visited white house and saw fighter planes passing by for the first time in my life, and was kinda frightened so I almost went down and cover my head with my hands instinctively, but I suppressed my insitincition. Later I saw many fighter planes in the sky above the campus I live.

I got used to smile and chitchat with cashiers, drivers, and all the other people who provide service. Sometimes I didn't really want to smile and talk to strangers, but people are suppose to be nice here, maybe I am just not a very nice person, or this being nice thing is just too fake.

I learned a little southen redneck accent, such as: I am fixin to leave, y'all too?

I went to Colorado, and skied for the first time in my life. My left thumb still hurts now, it's the consequence of me spending almost 2 hours (yes, I am a snail)skiing from the top of the mountain to the bottom.

Next week, I will be in New York City, taking a job interview and visiting around.

I miss China more than I expected. More specifically, I miss flower Yang and flower Xu, miss my college room mates, miss my rumei, miss my KPMG collgues, miss very siam, xi shu dou hua zhuang, huoguo, jianbing, yuxiang qie zi, gongbao jiding, larou....all the food, miss party world, vix, angel club, tang, coco banana.... (btw, none of the clubs in Atlanta is as good as those in beijing....)

 

I don't regret for the road I chose and whatever I did on this road (except one time, I didn't answer a question in accounting class, and I really regret for that), but I am still not sure where to go, and still not satisfied with myself.

For the new year, 2009, I don't think I will completely figure out where to go, but I will try my best to be a better person, which means to be nicer, more tolerant, have more opinions and speak them out, try more new things, speak better English, or maybe even Espanol and Francais, waste less time and be more productive, learn more cooking skills, work out more, call grandma more often, and hopefully, to get a good internship for next summer.

 

So much for the blahblahblah...

 

Happy New Year!